I’ve heard this song several times over the last couple of days, “Don’t Look Back in Anger”, by Oasis. I’ve always loved singing along with Neil Gallaher. Lately it feels very fitting. Part of the chorus goes like this:
“So Sally can wait, she knows it’s too late as we’re walking on by,
her soul slides away, but don’t look back in anger I heard you say.”
Now I don’t know who Sally is to Neil, but I have a Sally in my life, and I’ve never realized how powerful this song can be; several times I’ve tried to make a clean break, go back to where we started – not in this messed up, mashed up place. Every time, Sally has said, “Don’t look back in anger … “, and I have jumped back into the mish-mash; Reminded of another line from the song: “‘Cos you ain’t ever gonna burn my heart out.” And it’s true I do have a large capacity for love and compassion, and that will always be there; However, when it feels like you are taken for granted, the heart can feel black.
Now I’m again trying for that clean break, perhaps a total breakdown, and then see if there is anything left to build back up, a reset if you will. And this takes me back to the last lines of the song, a repeat of the chorus, with a twist:
” So Sally can wait
She knows it’s too late as she’s walking on by
My soul slides away
But don’t look back in anger
I heard you say …
At least not today“
And it is these days that I do feel my soul sliding away, and I need to find new obsessions. While these days are bleak, and I feel my honor tarnished, today and every day moving forward it feels like I can see the other side, the brighter side. Slowly the veil is being lifted, I only need to continue to march forward.